Award Night

[Articles are edited to omit the name of the award, just trying to stay off the search engines]

Award Will Honor US Representative Ron Barber

by Hot Off The Press (Release) on Sep. 06, 2013, under Press Releases

The Recovery Award was introduced in 2007 by Susan, after her son Daniel died by suicide while receiving treatment for schizophrenia. The Recovery Award recognizes local individuals that have inspired hope and who signify the determination and passion it takes to advocate, educate and support those living with mental illness as well as an individual that personally represents the path of recovery.

Criteria for the Recovery Award is based on 10-core principles of recovery, as determined by the National Consensus Conference on Mental Health Recovery and Mental Health Systems Transformation. These principles are self-direction, individualized and person-centered, empowerment, holistic, non-linear, strengths-based, peer support, respect, responsibility and hope. More information about recovery principles can be found here: http://www.samhsa.gov/pubs/mhc/MHC_recovery.htm

In 2012, three additional awards were added to recognize an advocate, direct service provider, and educator in for their contributions. This year’s awardees are:

Advocate - The Honorable Ron Barber, Congressman, 2nd District, Arizona

An advocate is a person who speaks and/or writes in support of or on behalf of a person or cause. Congressman Barber will receive this award because of his long-time, steadfast advocacy for investing in mental health services and reducing stigma associated with mental illness. His lifetime advocacy efforts were exemplified by his introduction of the Mental Health First Aid Act in Congress, January 2013.

Direct Service Provider – Hazel Heinzer, La Frontera

As a person who facilitates and/or coordinates services to promote the well being of another, Ms. Heinzer is being recognized for her persistence and patience seeking to promote the well-being of her clients from their clinical treatment to their involvement in community activities into adulthood.

Educator – Cheryl Glass, Camp Wellness, University of Arizona

A person that shares information and knowledge with others, enabling them to increase understanding or skills to enhance their lives, Cheryl Glass was selected because under Ms. Glass’ leadership, not only did Camp Wellness thrive and flourish but has become a shining example of an empowerment based recovery program embodying all the values represented by the Award.

2013 Awardees Announced

by Susan Moreno on Sep. 15, 2013, under Health

...In 2012, three additional awards were added to recognize an advocate, direct service provider, and educator for their contributions. This year’s awardees are:

Advocate – The Honorable Ron Barber, Congressman, 2nd District, Arizona
An advocate is a person who speaks and/or writes in support of or on behalf of a person or cause. Congressman Barber will receive this award because of his tireless effort to reduce stigma and create an environment of effective, accessible treatment..

Direct Service Provider – Hazel Heinzer, La Frontera Clinician
As a person who facilitates and/or coordinates services to promote the well being of another, Hazel Heinzer is being recognized for continuous support in treating the entire family in various roles in shelters, homes and clinical settings.

Educator – Cheryl Glass, Camp Wellness, University of Arizona
A person that shares information and knowledge with others, enabling them to increase understanding or skills to enhance their lives, Cheryl Glass was selected because “She has played a key role in helping hundreds of people with a serious mental illness to find meaning and purpose in their own lives and come to the realization that not only is recovery possible but that it can be a reality.”

Usually this blog is about Tyler, but I'm  making an exception...

I love my team! Eric, a former employee, and Julie Mack, who hired me to be a tobacco prevention specialist, and later hired me again to be a tobacco research specialist, nominated me for this award. My team knew I was nervous about the whole award/ceremony/publicity thing, and supported me through each step - from choosing to give up their Friday night to come clap for me to taking my picture and cropping it at the most flattering angle. Then on Friday morning, when I arrived at work, my office door was ajar and I found these:

The camp nurse brought me these. This was especially touching to me, because she herself attended camp, got well, and returned to work. She described coming to camp as "everything around me was dark, but when I walked in those doors, there was light." Pretty awesome.

I worked late and picked Tyler up a little before six. I brought in his fancy shirt and pants, thinking I'd dress him and ask the preschool teacher to get a picture of us all dolled up. But alas, he could see the jumping castle for First Friday outside, and when I told him we couldn't play on it that night, it became obvious he wouldn't be getting dressed anytime soon. I packed him into the car, with great difficulty, then asked him if he wanted to go to Wesley's birthday party the next day, and did he think there would be cake? Suddenly all was right in the world again. I called Tyson to warn him that I would need his help in the parking lot of the country club.

We dressed Tyler in the parking lot, but still forgot to get a picture. He looked snazzy, just like his dad.
The awards ceremony was held at Skyline Country Club, up high in the Catalina Foothills, with a stunning view of the city lights. When we entered, we were given a program for the evening, here's part of it:

Ron Barber couldn't make it. (Tyler, this was during a government shutdown, where all the congressmen fail to make a decision, or because they're stubbornly trying to block a decision made by the president, and so government employees like your Uncle Art are forced to take an unplanned, unpaid vacation until those congressmen finally make up their minds)(please note, there is no such thing as a parental shutdown.) His wife Nancy accepted the award on his behalf. This was special to me, because when Tyler was a few days old, I brought him to Nancy, a lactation specialist at the birth center, and begged her to help me, because he wasn't eating. She was so soothing and helpful, got us situated, and all was well. I never got to thank her properly until this night. 

I was in denial about having a give a speech, so I didn't write one. The other recipients, on the other hand, wrote out multiple pages. The program ran very late, Tyler behaved perfectly throughout, and was falling asleep when it was time for me to accept the award. I had planned to bring him up there with me as an easy early escape route, but he was cozy on Tyson's lap, and I feared moving him would inspire blood curdling screams. I stumbled up there by myself, muttered something along the lines of having a great job because I actually get to see people recover and get well everyday, and that my team is awesome, because they're the ones doing it. I held up the award to them, said "This is us!" and booked it back to my seat.

I had the pleasure of meeting Daniel's mom, Susan, who also works in the behavioral health field, specializing in youth. She was a joy to meet, charismatic, warm, and very huggable.

I have to say, thinking of this as a team award, it is very cool to get recognized for the hard work that we do, and that people truly get well! Our program turned out to be bigger and better than I ever expected, and while our goal was to help people improve their health and wellness, the unintended consequence of helping people return to work, and form this amazing, supportive, health-oriented community was more than I ever dreamed. Recovery rocks!

And I just can't get enough of these flowers!

Preschool

Tyler started his new preschool at the end of August. It is so different from daycare. So much structure! So many activities! When Tyler gets into the car at the end of the day, he sits quietly, staring off into space, for much of the ride home. I realized I have to stop asking him questions, and just let him chill for that time. On the days that I run with the stroller to pick him up, then run with him in the stroller back to work to get the car, he chatters, but only to tell me about the Truffula Trees. At night we try to get more information out of him about his day.

We were invited to an open house for his school last week, and we got to see him in action. First, I learned how very, very important it is to attend these events - when I arrived, a few minutes late, I could tell he had been crying, and a staff member explained, "He thought you weren't coming." Ouch! We sat next to a little girl whose parents didn't come, and my heart was breaking for her. At daycare, parents were invited to events, but I could tell from the pictures, only one or two would ever show up. But at preschool, parents are THERE. 

I hung out while Tyler ate his snack (apples and cheese) in the lunchroom, then watched as he was directed to dispose of his trash, push in his chair, and stand with his hands behind his back and wait until he was called to line up. It seemed a bit militant, but I realized, it likely prevents fights caused when kids poke each other and the teachers can't monitor as closely. 

Upon entering his classroom, he has to slide his picture out of an envelope on the door, and post it in the right spot on the door, to show that he is present for the day. I saw a binder with his picture on it, opened it, and discovered artwork about the letter A, the letter for the week. The teacher then went over the calendar with the kids, singing a song about the days of the week, first in English, then in Spanish, and then the months of the year. She then helped them identify the specific day, date, and month. She went over their job list for the week. Tyler's role was "Door Holder." Then they spent time with the letter A, identifying words that start with A, and reading a book about occupations that start with A. Next they danced to some music - a freeze dance. Tyler's mode of dance is jumping. And wow is he happy doing it! I saw he's very good at freezing on time - something he struggled with all summer in sports class. Next was a book, then another dance, an elephant dance, walking around in a circle swinging their trunk. 

Then the kids were told to line up again, and headed off to the "computer lab." There were two computers. While two kids at a time work on the computers, the other kids are divided to sit at tables, each table with a different project. The first table we were assigned to was the robot construction table. It was tough! The next table was much easier, stringing plastic keys onto a keyring. The third table was puzzles - and then it was Tyler's turn to work on the computer. He played a game to release letters, hear the letter sound, then click on objects that started with that letter. 

After that, he returned to the puzzle table, but both Tyson and I needed to get back to work. Most other parents had already left. We were surprised to see the lower lip jut out, and despite our efforts to "rip the bandaid off quickly", we could hear him wailing after we left. But he doesn't cry each morning when I drop him off, and he's not crying in the evening when I pick him up. He engages more quickly in the mornings here than at the previous school, and just seems to be having so much fun. The "tricycle yard" is bigger than the play yard at daycare, and there's also a sand yard with playground equipment, slides, tunnels, which I know he gets to play in too, but they use that after lunch and towards the end of the day, but are always back inside by the time I arrive to pick him up. He had his first Chapel experience, they have chapel once a month, and this month's value is "Friendship." Yesterday, a magician visited, but all Tyler will say is that he brought a white bunny.
 At the end of the day when I come to pick him up, there are several families hanging out, letting their kids play on the grassy lawn (a novelty in Tucson.) We're so excited for Tyler to get to have so many new opportunities!

Truffula Trees

I was warned that Threes are more terrible than Twos, but so far this has not been the case. At one point this summer, when I was trying to woo my sister into meeting me for a conference by saying not only is Sedona beautiful, but Tyler is supercute right now, she noted, "You're awful sweet on him right now, aren't you?" I remembered then, that my nephew Cole was supercute at 3, and 3 was the age that I met my good friend's son, Ashton, and he captured my heart right away, too. There's just something magical about the age of 3.

Truffula Trees are a great example. Melanie (who happens to be the mother of that previously supercute Ashton, who has most likely graduated from supercute to supercool by now) gave Tyler a big Dr. Suess book (compilation of books) back when he was a wee little elf, and I was sad that Tyler never got into it. He loved Fox in Socks, and went through a Cat in the Hat phase, and loved Green Eggs and Ham, but that big book of Dr. Suess, he just wasn't having it. One night, I heard through the monitor Tyson reading to him from that book, reading "Yertle the Turtle" and Tyler was complaining and crying about it, asking for a different book, but Tyson just kept reading anyway. The next night, through the monitor, I heard Tyler ask for the book again. Tyson read Yertle the Turtle, then read "The Lorax". I was impressed with Tyler's attention span for two long stories in a row. I had no idea how magical The Lorax would become.

From then on, each night, Tyler has asked for "the book with the trees." Eventually, he began asking for "the Lorlax." Now, finally, "The Lorax." As we drive to school each morning, Tyler spends the entire 35 minute commute talking on and on about Truffula Trees. Except he's the "bad guy" - he wants to chop down the Truffula Trees! Some days, he tells me he's going to chop down one. Other days he wants to chop four. Other days five! That's more than the Once-ler could ever chop down at a time. When we go running, he sits upright in the stroller, and as we pass palm trees, Tyler points at them, and describes the color of the Truffula Tufts, pink or purple or blue or green. I hear him talking to his teachers about Truffula Trees. It's non-stop. Of course, because Truffula Trees are what everyone, everyone, everyone needs!

Part of the supercute factor is that Tyler is so affectionate right now. His vocabulary and speech have increased so much, and conversations are quite entertaining. He shows his silly side more often, and is bouncy, like Tigger. He likes to climb on Vader like a motorcycle and bounces on him, too. 

Tyler's favorite things are still his train set, which is played with nightly, and books. He watches some YouTube videos of trains most nights on my iphone, and plays Angry Birds, Cookies, Spanish, and Letters on it as well. We've cut back on movie time. I heard Tyson tell Tyler, "On the nights when you and Mommy go running, you get home too late to watch a movie." I felt a pang of guilt, then remembered - I'd far rather Tyler go for a stroller ride with me and look for Truffula Trees than watch a movie every night. 

Also, at some point I felt rather distressed that Tyler only ate hot dogs, fish sticks, grilled cheese sandwiches, and quesadillas. I remember lamenting to my sister about this - how could a health educator let her son eat such a horrible diet? She reminded me, there's a reason kids' menus in restaurants across the country serve hot dogs, fish sticks, grilled cheese sandwiches, and quesadillas - because kids eat them. That was when I remembered, "That's right! We couldn't get him to eat anything at all! We were desperate to get him to eat! That's how we landed here!" She gave me permission to be more patient and forgiving of myself.

And then we began the rule of, "If you want a hot dog, first you have to eat your vegetables." Painful at first, but now, most nights, it's expected. While we were in San Diego, Tyler was so overstimulated that it was easier to get him to try new foods - chicken/pesto/parmesan pizza, for one. When we returned from vacation, we made it a point to just keep serving him the same food we're eating. He's been having a harder time this week with a roast, but otherwise, he's been great at eating the foods we're eating, especially chicken. Much healthier than hot dogs and fish sticks! 

The other habit we broke was eating in front of the TV. Again, how did a health educator let her kid eat in front of the TV? Because a) our kitchen table is a high table, and being strapped in a tall chair for safety turned mealtime into a prison sentence, and b) this kid could outlast Ghandi in a hunger strike. But he loved his movies. So we'd let him eat while watching the movie, and if he stopped eating, we'd pause the TV until he took a bite. Horrible, I know. But it was an act of desperation. Until, as I was working on my continuing education credits, I was reminded how damaging watching meals in front of the TV is to our ability to regulate our appetites, notice hunger and satiety cues, sets us up for obesity and diabetes...And a conference seminar I attended on epigenetics discussed the value of human touch, but also the value of eating meals as a family at the dinner table as a way to impact our phenotypic expression when genetically predisposed to chronic diseases...So, we're eating at the table now. Tyler is tall enough to climb in and out of our nice tall chairs with ease, he's using the placemat Grandma Glass bought him for his birthday, and although Tyson may be doing schoolwork at the table while we eat, at least we're together, and I give Tyler my undivided attention. It is painful though - he takes up to an hour to eat. (Saying "I"m gonna pause it!" is meaningless now!") I'm struggling with the ability to trust the principles of intuitive eating when it comes to Tyler - he went on hunger strike the moment he was born, and I have always had difficulty with appetite and hunger cues (lack thereof, I mean), so I haven't been able to let go and figure, if he's hungry, he'll eat, if not, let him get down. Struggling with it, but I know we'll find our way in time. I think I'm going to try setting the timer for 30 minutes. Or find out what other people have done.

At any rate, the three year old version of Tyler is supercute, even if he does want to chop down all the Truffula Trees. 

 

The Thing About Grandpas...

I never met either of my grandfathers. Tyson never met his dad's dad, and was pretty young when his mom's dad died. So it has been especially touching to me to watch Tyler and Grandpa Keith together.

This last visit, Grandpa Keith arrived, and before he could even sit down, Tyler was approaching him, describing his Hot Wheels car collection. Grandpa Keith sat down in the rocking chair, and Tyler climbed into his lap, chattering away.

This didn't come overnight. That Grandpa Keith, he's strategic. For many months, each time he's come to visit, he's had a Hot Wheels car in his shirt pocket. When Tyler would decline to say hello or otherwise acknowledge Grandpa's presence, Grandpa would pull the toy car out of his pocket, and begin quietly play with it on the coffee table. Tyler would soon notice and approach Grandpa, wanting to see the car. Somehow, by the end of the visit, Grandpa would leave minus one car, while Tyler would have an addition to his collection.

It wasn't until this particular visit that I realized the full impact of this strategy. Grandpa and Tyler now have a common interest, something to talk about at every visit. Tyler is now interested in cars from the 60's and 70's, gets excited to see them on the road or in photos, and looks forward to seeing his Grandpa. I hope this bond continues and that Tyler and Terry have a wonderful relationship in the years ahead.

Farewell to Casita Feliz Daycare

Casita Feliz Works Wonders!

Before

After

Before Tyler came to Casita Feliz, he was unable to speak, walk, toilet himself…he wasn’t even capable of drinking milk out of a baby bottle.

Now, thanks to Casita Feliz, Tyler is able to walk, run, jump, speak in complete sentences, count to 12 or 20 (depending on the day), recognize 26 letters, wash dishes, bus tables, cook meals, and feed, clothe, and cleanse himself.

Thanks, Casita Feliz!

So many wonderful people helped him along the way.

Mrs. Maria, in a matter of hours, taught Tyler to drink milk from a baby bottle -something we’d been unable to do for months. She later coaxed him to take his first steps, dangling a spicy hot Cheetoh as a carrot.

Mrs. Liliana worked to fine tune Tyler’s walking skills, until he was able to walk so well that he was moved out of her nursery and into the toddler room. Devastated at the impact of her success, Mrs. Liliana still maintained a welcoming, comforting home for Tyler to return to when the Shark Tank was just too much, at times opening her door to discover Tyler asleep on the threshold – “He was trying to come home!”

Ms. Andrea taught Tyler the value of a warm, comfy lap and loving arms to help him face the start of each day in the toddler room.

Ms. Stephanie taught Tyler to recognize shapes and colors, to clean up after himself, and the joy of learning.

Ms. Monica taught Tyler to walk out of the building by himself, when he was absolutely convinced that, though he could walk all day, the only way out of the building was to be carried by a parental figure. (Ms. Monica also enabled Tyler’s parents, in that teaching moment, to remain steadfast in the face of a massive tantrum and ensuing standoff, so that Tyler learned that tantrums would not help him get his way.)

Miss Stephanie taught Tyler kindness and how to use communication skills to get through tough times.

Ms. Lupita taught Tyler to look forward to starting the day with a hug, a song, and a dance, usually to the tune of “We’re Going on a Bear Hunt.”

Mrs. Zelia taught Tyler to use the toilet – a noble and frustrating task. She also introduced him to iphone technology. Tyler is now capable of navigating the iphone to locate and use a variety of applications and play games, and to surf the web and find numerous videos of trains and some strange woman with manicured nails and a thumb ring endlessly opening Easter eggs with toys inside, describing the toys and showing them at every angle.

Ms. Andrea returned to teach Tyler confidence, the value of a schedule, and the satisfaction of success.

Ms. Pat taught Tyler the letters of the alphabet, to write his name, to count, and to love the letter, T – “like Tyler!”

Ms. Teresa taught Tyler to stand when he pees and to wipe his own a--!

Ms. Vanessa and Ms. Stacy taught Tyler the social nuances of making and keeping friends, to expand his vocabulary and musical repertoire, and to use logic and reasoning skills.

The rest of the staff helped Tyler in so many ways, we can’t even list them all, fostering a love of cooking and baking, a love of the outdoors, to jump, to sing so many delightful songs, etc, etc, etc.

Thank you all, for all that you have done, and the memories and love you have shared.

We will miss you!!!

San Diego Part IV

The next night we went to another brewpub. Tyson tried a flight, and I tried a porter.

 We were not impressed. We were so unimpressed that I don't even remember the name of it!

But we had the opportunity to check out Anne Marie's moves:

We spent our last full day in San Diego at Sea World. We'd taken Tyler there when he was one and a half years old, so it felt like it was his first time. He loves animals, and we were going to take him to the aquarium, but when he described the animals he wanted to see - sharks, dolphins, and whales, we realized we'd be better off at Sea World. 

We visited the freshwater aquarium, and spent a long time in the penguin exhibit. Tyler liked the sea lion/otter show (and we liked watching the sea lions disobey the trainers for the entire show, good for them!), he loved the show with the pilot whales, but of course, the orcas were his favorite.

After the show, we were able to get a closer look.

In the early evening, we decided to spend some time on the kiddie rides. Anne Marie and I had taken Tyler on his first roller coaster ride at the Pima County Fair, but Tyson was stuck working on a school project, and missed out. So he was especially excited to get to ride with Tyler this time. Tyler eagerly yet patiently waited for his turn to ride.

I think Tyson might have been even more excited than Tyler.

Grandma took Tyler on the eel ride, reinforcing the "arms up!" rule.

Tyler patiently waited all day for his opportunity to try cotton candy. Just look at the anticipation on his face!

Once he got it, though, he wasn't so sure that he liked it.

What an awesome day!

Saturday morning, we hit the beach one last time, then headed home.

What a wonderful vacation! Thanks Grandma Allaire!

San Diego Part III

Ah. Stone Brewery. We love this brewery, and have now celebrated Tyson's birthday there three years in a row. The food is fancier than what I'm used to, but delightful, they have great beer, and the scenery is amazing.

Checking out the koi pond...

Tyler tried out some fancy food, with a little motivation from Tyson.

A big birthday kiss!

We didn't get a chance to eat the ice cream cake on the day of Tyson's birthday - Tyler fell asleep! It was easy to extend the celebration into the next day.

We explored tide pools along the Ocean Beach Pier, finding crabs, anemones, small fish, and a couple of hermit crabs.

That evening, we checked out Coronado Brewing Company, located on Coronado Island.

I love the black and white version of their logo.

They grow their own hop vines up on the roof.

I loved the landscaping - not as cool as Stone, but impressive nonetheless.

This display makes it easy to love succulents.

Tyson and I each enjoyed a flight of beers - I loved that we were allowed to choose which beers we wanted to taste. (Tyson's beers were all hoppy, mine were all low on the hops/ IBU scale.) Mmm. That first beer on the left was especially yummy. Morena Mild.

Back at the cottage, Tyler helped Tyson "souffle" the candles on his cake.

Happy Birthday Tyson!!!

San Diego Part II

On Monday, we went to the Children's Museum. Some of you know how unhappy I am with the Tucson Children's Museum, having grown up going to the Children's Museum in DC. The San Diego Children's Museum is much more up my alley. So much to do! Shooting balls...

Making a clay sculpture...(an airplane!)

Playing on an indoor playground recycled from an old trash dumpster...

The museum had three floors.

Upstairs on the balcony, there are bubbles galore...

An oversized play house (The Rain House)...

And downstairs were more activities, all with a recycling theme.

Such focus!

Tyler was so helpful and fun on this trip.

Children and adults alike were fascinated by Tyson's construction skills.

Back on the ground level, Tyler was excited to paint.

This car gets painted a different color each day. I couldn't resist poking a hole as far as my finger could go to see all the layers of colors. Such a cool spongy feeling!

As Tyler cleaned up after painting, I noticed the similarity of his and Tyson's lower right legs...

On the way back from the museum, we stopped at Mission Brewery. We took a look around and loved it, but were unable to stay - we needed solid food instead of liquid calories, and despite our attempts to keep him awake, Tyler had fallen asleep.

Stay tuned for Part III!